My friend told me her story about 20 years ago. And it stayed with me. She has given me permission to tell it. Her father violated her.
She said they fled Nigeria as a result of the civil war. They got a place here in England. A three bedroom property. Her parents had one room. Her mixed gender siblings had one room and my friend had one room to herself. This was the beginning of sibling rivalry. How could she have a room to herself while everyone else shared a room he siblings said. Little did they know. What they did not know was that she could give anything to share a room with someone else. For in having a room to herself, her father had free access to come into her room to rape her. Constantly.
He treated her like a princess. Opened a bank account for her and gave her money generously. This made her siblings almost hate her because she was the only child Daddy gave money to, and generously too. What her siblings did not know was that she was paying in kind the money he paid her to take her innocence.
He impregnated her. I think she was about 13 when it happened the first time. Her parents took her to the GP for an abortion. And he continued to abuse her. She got pregnant again. Again, her parents took her to the GP and had to have an abortion again. They told the G.P that she was loose and needed to have contraception. She had a coil fitted when she was about 14.
And her father continued. Till she found him trying to groom her junior sister. She told him she would kill him if he tried it with her sister. He then stopped.
She said that because her parents had called her loose, she then decided to ‘earn’ the label.
Her parents have died now but she said she has forgiven them and is no longer bitter or angry.
By Olu Bunmi